It may seem contradictory, but being good at conversation doesn't require saying much at all- it requires listening intently. Unless you have something specific to convey, or an activity in common, finding non-controversial topics to discuss may not present themselves immediately. Most people, however, will let you know what they want to talk about, and if you let them lead the conversation, they will leave happy. If the topic that comes up is something you know nothing about, let them teach you about it- ask questions and let them lead you to either an understanding, or more questions.
Most folks I have met are happy talking shop- ask them about their work and if you can understand the good and bad points, they will feel you understand their point of view and can sympathize with their frustrations- since we all have them, however slight they may appear in the grand scheme of things. Reading the news can give you the opportunity to discuss current events, but try not to choose a topic where you might butt heads- stay away from politics unless you are running for office or scouting opinions for a reason, liking taking a poll. Sports is always a good choice, and another is emerging technologies. If you can start a thread with "Did you hear about…" and not lead it to gossip, you will leave them with something to think about; try to have references ready- don't, as I sometimes do, say you can't remember where you read it unless you are asking them in order to find out. Offer to email them an article on the topic you found interesting.
Conversing isn't that hard, its getting started that's hard, so come prepared. ;-)
No comments:
Post a Comment